Alex Van Halen, Vanilla Ice, Ace Frehley & Gene Simmons Form New Super Group

Fans all over the world were shocked today when news of the latest super group rocked the internet. In a bizarre mashup, members of KISS, Van Halen and Vanilla Ice are joining forces.

The bass player from KISS, Gene Simmons, The former guitarist of KISS, Ace Frehley, The drummer of Van Halen, Alex Van Halen and ‘rapper’ Vanilla Ice are forming a new band. The band will be called “Alex, Ice, Ace & A$$”.

Gene Simmons and Alex Van Halen go way back as Gene discovered a young Van Halen in a bar in Hollywood back in 1976. “I was blown away” said Simmons. “I produced a demo for them and tried to get KISS to take the young band under our wings. But the jackasses that they are, no one else saw what I did. We were heading out on tour so we passed on Van Halen. Of course Van Halen signed with Warner Brothers and became superstars. I lost out on a lot of money.”

Bigger Than The Beatles

When asked about this new supergroup, Gene told Madhouse, “I was over at Alex’s house and Ace showed up. We started jamming. Rob Van Winkle aka Vanilla Ice coincidentally works as a handyman for Alex. We started playing “Under Pressure” by Queen which morphed into “Ice Ice Baby”. Rob heard us so he put down his paint brush and came and jammed with us. The chemistry was magical. We looked at each other and we all knew instantly. I predict this band will be bigger than KISS, Van Halen and The Beatles combined.”

Alex Van Halen, Vanilla Ice, Ace Frehley & Gene Simmons Form New Super Group

Does this mean the long standing feud between Ace and Simmons has come to an end? There has been a lot of bad blood over the years with Ace claiming Gene groped his wife. Gene then countered that Ace once groped him! Simmons told Madhouse Magazine that once in 1975, while on tour in Bavaria, the band stopped into an old church. While visiting the church, Simmons claims Frehley was “hopped up on goofballs” and chased him around the rectory and eventually grabbed him by the organ!

“Yeah that is water under bridge man” said Ace Frehley. “I am excited about this new project. Besides being the best rapper of all time, Vanilla Ice can sing his butt off. He sings like an angel. Wait until you hear this, you will not believe it. He can sing circles around that douche Paul Stanley.”

Alex Ace Ice & A$$

“Alex, Ace, Ice & A$$” recorded 12 new songs including 6 originals and 6 covers. The album will contain killer Rock/Rap cover versions of: “Ice, Ice Baby” “Rock n Roll All Nite” “New York Groove” “Jump” “Hot For Teacher” and “Stairway to Heaven”. Stay tuned for details on a world tour to start early next year.