Workers Find Lost Joe Walsh Funk#1-47 Scrolls in Wall of Holiday Inn

Workers uncover the Lost Joe Walsh scrolls. A construction crew in Cleveland, Ohio, has stumbled upon a hidden cache of scrolls while renovating a dilapidated 1970s Holiday Inn. The scrolls, which appear to be ancient Rock n Roll manuscripts, contain what experts believe to be the long-lost songs “Funk#1” through “Funk#47” by none other than the legendary Joe Walsh.

Walsh, is best known as a member of The Eagles and for his solo career. However, he was in a band in the 1960s and early 70s called The James Gang. They recorded the songs Funk#48 and Funk#49. Fans often wondered whatever happened to Funk#1 through Funk#47. Rumors and innuendos followed Joe through the years. There was talk that he wrote a suite of music consisting of 47 Funk pieces. The music seemed to be lost forever and all hope was gone.

The Lost Joe Walsh Scrolls

That is until today. A crew of workers were renovating a Holiday Inn in Cleveland, Ohio when they made the shocking discovery. Hidden in the wall of room 709 was a box of scrolls covered in asbestos. Foreman Lloyd Madrid at first thought it was a bible or something but then he noticed the musical notes. Resident expert and Sheet rocker Jim Vickers knew they had something special on their hands. “My grand pappy Clem often told tale of the great missing Funk scrolls of Joe Walsh. I thought it was an urban legend but I was looking right at it. It was the holy grail of funk.”

During the 20th century, Joe Walsh was known as the undisputed king of hotel room trashing. Endless drugs and partying were only the tip of the iceberg. Joe had an affinity for absolutely demolishing his hotel rooms like no one else in history. Throwing TVs over balconies, cutting down walls with a chainsaw, tearing wallpaper, urinating, defecating, vomiting and lighting things on fire were all parts of Walsh’s “redecorating” methods.

Funk#1-47

Apparently in the 1970s, Walsh completed his master work of the Funks#1-47. He had composed the music on 300 scrolls made from sheep’s intestines. But then Joe slowly lapsed into a booze fueled blackout. During a moment of clarity Joe stashed the scrolls into a wall that he smashed open with a pick axe. 36 hours later, Walsh was forcibly removed from the Hotel by the military. He was strapped to a gurney and taken to the hospital.

Joe forgot all about the scrolls and they were seemingly lost forever. When told of the good news today, Walsh commented, “Oh yeah I knew I wrote them down somewhere. I wondered where they went to, but then I wasn’t sure if I dreamt it or if it was a blackout hallucination.” Joe plans to record the Funk works and release on a double album later this year.