Sharon Osbourne Clones Ozzy: Little Ozzy’s Embark On World Tour

Sharon Osbourne has confirmed that she has indeed cloned her husband Ozzy. That’s right, we now have multiple little Ozzy’s roaming the Earth, ready to rock and roll. Basically Sharon partnered with a team of mad scientists to create clones of the Prince of Darkness. The tiny Ozzy army will ensure that his music lives on forever. They are scheduled to tour this year.

Ozzy and Sharon moved back to the UK to live in their 350-acre estate in Buckinghamshire, England. They mentioned many phony reasons for the move, However we now know the truth is they moved to set up a secret clone laboratory. The lab is hidden beneath their secluded mansion.

Sharon Osbourne Clones Ozzy

Sharon told Madhouse News, “I got the idea from Gene Simmons. He was yammering on about cloning KISS so he can make money from the band forever. Then when Ozzy had to cancel his tour for ailing health I bought a book, ‘Cloning For Dummies’. Then I hired a team of weirdo scientists from some Institute in Austria. At first we created four little Ozzy’s. Each Ozzy is approximately 24-36 inches tall. Cloning is expensive you know, the little Ozzies are much more cost effective. They were on sale, half off.”

Sharon continued, “They are also much easier to contain and corral if they are tiny. All things considered, A full grown Ozzy is quite the handful, can you imagine hundreds of these madmen roaming around? This way, after the show I can throw them in my suitcase or scoop them up like an infant.”

Sharon Osbourne Clones Ozzy: Little Ozzy’s Embark On World Tour

The plan is to eventually have hundreds of little Ozzy’s performing all over the world simultaneously. Can you imagine Ozzy performing in New York City, London, Paris, Milan and Minsk all on the same night. The clones sound exactly like Ozzy without all of the offstage antics. They don’t even get paid. The real Osbourne’s collect all the money. After the concert the little Ozzy’s can be stored away in a case just like a guitar or amplifier.

But the fun doesn’t stop there! Each Ozzy clone comes with its own unique set of quirks. There’s Vegan Ozzy, who replaced his bat-biting antics with kale-chomping extravaganzas. Environmentalist Ozzy is constantly seen hugging trees and lecturing about the importance of recycling. And Tech Geek Ozzy is the mastermind behind the cloning technology, always tinkering with gadgets and muttering about the next software update.”

Ozzy Clone Army

The Ozzy clone army has become a global sensation. Fans are lining up to buy pre-sale tickets to see their favorite Ozzy incarnation, collecting merchandise, and even starting fan clubs dedicated to their specific clone of choice. It’s a strange new world we’re living in, but hey, it’s Ozzy Osbourne we’re talking about. Sharon Osbourne Clones Ozzy is not a normal headline we expected to see. But then again, nothing he does can be considered “normal.”