Neil Peart Hysterical Kids Books About Geddy Lee Released by Estate

Drummer Neil Peart may be gone, but his estate has posthumously released a series of children’s books that Neil wrote over the years. As has been noted Estate spokesperson Claude Peart commented, “The time is right. The world needs some good humor, and I need a new boat.”

Peart’s series of inappropriate children’s books, ridicule and mock his former Rush bandmates. All in good fun of course. The first book is titled “Geddy Chokes his Chicken”, which laughs at Bass Player Geddy Lee’s alleged lifelong masturbation addiction. Geddy has allegedly admitted that in the past he pleasured himself up to 7 times per day.

Neil Peart Writes Kids Books

“Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Hall of Fame Speech” pokes fun at Guitarist Alex Lifeson’s ridiculous speech during the band’s induction into the Rock n Roll Hall of Fame. During the infamous speech, Lifeson uttered blah blah blah over and over again ad nauseam. At the time, Neil was thoroughly embarrassed and vowed to get back at Alex. “You think that’s funny Alex? Just Wait, I will show you funny.” He began writing the book immediately that day.

Neil Peart Childrens Books — Geddy Chokes His Chicken

In “Mommy Drinks Because You’re Bad” Peart takes aim at Geddy’s Mother’s Alcoholism. Other books in the series include “Gary’s Horrible Secret”, which is about Geddy Lee’s Grandpa molesting him and “Goodbye Testicles”, which ridicules Geddy’s high voice and his marriage.

Geddy Lee

At this point Geddy Lee commented “Wait, What? None of this is true. My mother did not drink, I don’t masturbate and my Grandpa just liked to wrestle! It’s perfectly normal. What is going on here? These don’t seem like children’s books. What kind of a sick mind would read these books to their children! I demand you cease and desist.”

The Children’s Books are published by Balzac & Balzac publishing which is headquartered in the Balkan Islands. “It’s totally legit” said Balzac CEO Diane Rico. “We have years worth of material. We will be publishing books like these for years to come. Maybe Neil wrote them, maybe he didn’t. Either way we are getting paid.”