Madonna Kicked By Mule – Loses British Accent!

Singer/Actress Madonna was kicked by a mule Sunday. Miraculously, the kick to the head knocked her phony British accent right out of her. 

Madonna lived in England for a while and put on a fake British accent for many years. Why she did this, no one knows. She gave up England and currently lives in a palace in Lisbon, Portugal. She kept the accent, however. 

The Moops!?

The singer’s 18th-century Moorish Revival mansion is 56,146-square-foot and includes twenty-four bedrooms, one bathroom, a guesthouse, 2 solariums, a bowling alley, indoor golf course, a torture chamber and a caretaker’s cottage. It is reported that it set the star back a cool million. She shares it with her children Lourdes, Rocco, Tex, Clem and twins Ralph and Norton. Four of the children were adopted from Malawi. 

Madonna was in Malawi over the weekend shopping for new children to ‘adopt’. She came upon a small farm and went to steal 2 children who lived there, but the parents objected. Madonna tried to escape with the stolen children and ran and hid in the barn. That’s when she got kicked in the head by the Mule. She was said to be stunned and stumbling around in a circle saying, “Duh which way did he go George, which way did he go.”

A Madonna spokesperson stated “It was the strangest thing, before the incident Madonna was speaking like the Queen of England, and then after the Mule kicked her, she was speaking like a girl from Queens, New York. It really is a miracle. We are glad she will be ok though.”

Doctors report besides the loss of the phony accent, and a big lump, Madonna will be fine. Speech experts and Alec Baldwin’s wife, are now working with Madonna to develop a phony Portuguese accent.

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