Greta Van Fleet Cancels Tour! Lead Singer Grounded By Parents!

In a shocking turn of events today, Greta Van Fleet was forced to cancel the remaining dates on the current tour. 

Singer Josh Kiszka was grounded by his parents for 2 weeks with no exceptions. He is not allowed to leave the house and no friends are allowed to come over. This means no playing music and no touring. Josh must stay in the house and do chores. 

No Playing Ball In The House

Apparently Josh and his brothers, guitarist Jake & bassist Sam Kiszka were playing basketball in the house, despite their mother telling them never to play ball in the house. The boys disobeyed their mom and were playing ball in the house and Josh ended up breaking their Mom’s favorite vase. 

“Josh is such a spaz” said brother Sam. “I threw him the ball and he totally missed it. It went bouncing down the stairs and smashed the vase. He just stood there like a dope watching it. I would have totally caught the ball. Or at least blocked it.”

The boys tried to cover up the broken vase by glueing it back together. They felt it would buy them time and Mom would not notice the broken vase and they would confess after the tour had ended. However, Mrs. Kiszka found out and put an end to the tour immediately. “You boys get your butts home right this minute” said Mrs. Kiszka, “wait until your father gets home. It was my favorite vase. My grandmother smuggled the vase out of Russia. It was her only possession when she came to this country. “

The tour will begin again, as soon as Josh’s grounding ends. In the meantime, millions of fans are disappointed and hundreds of crew members and theater workers are out of work. Longtime fan Charles Creel pleaded with Mrs. Kiszka to reconsider. “I will gladly pay for the vase, or I will do the boys chores if you let them tour. I can mow the lawn.”

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