Green Day Facing Backlash bc Bass Player Looks Like Putin

Punk rock band Green Day is facing a backlash due to the fact that bass player Mike Dirnt has an uncanny resemblance to Vladimir Putin.

Fans are calling for a public burning of all things Green Day. This includes Green Day magazines, books, posters, albums, cds, and even laptops, thumb drives etc with digital copies of Green Day music.

Green Day fan Robert Hart organized the book and music burning. “I have always wanted to burn some books and albums” said Hart. “I have a mean streak in me and I am not that bright. This gives me some power. It will be short lived so I am jumping on this bandwagon and running with it. So the burning will take place Friday evening. The main burning will take place in Rancho Cucamonga but I encourage all like minded citizens and fans to have book and music burnings in their towns.”

Neil Young

Radio stations and streaming services have pulled all Green Day music. Neil Young thinks it is a great idea. “Yes, we must act immediately” said Neil. Get them off Spotify. “I never heard of Green Day personally, but if the bass player looks like Putin we must act immediately.”

Politicians all over the globe are calling for sanctions on Green Day. They have frozen the bands assets and all bank accounts. International forces are seizing the bands yachts and mansions. Their passports have been confiscated and the band members are basically under house arrest. The French finance minister Bruno Le Maire said, “We are pursuing the complete census of financial assets, real estate, yachts and luxury vehicles that would belong to Green Day personalities under European sanctions.”

Billie Joe Armstrong

Green Day leader Billie Joe Armstrong commented, “WTF is going on here? We are a stupid band. Yes, I agree that Mike looks like Putin but so what. We have joked about it for years but how does that make you guilty of anything? Having a resemblance to someone is now a crime?”

Green Day Vladimir Putin

Many theories suggest that Dirnt is either the son of Putin or perhaps even a clone that the Soviet leader created to undermine western society. Andrew Hogger who runs a Putin Green Day blog out of his mothers basement told Madhouse News, “The official report is that Mike was born in California, but we have never seen Putin and Dirnt at the same time, same place. Plus Mike was married to a girl named Anastasia. There’s your smoking gun.”