Engelbert Humperdinck Named New Wild ‘n Out Host

By Claudia Stavola

ViacomCBS named Engelbert Humperdinck as the new host of MTV’s Wild ‘n Out after firing original host and creator, Nick Cannon. Cannon was fired after making anti-Semitic remarks on a podcast that nobody was aware of until ViacomCBS brought it to everybody’s attention like a bunch of gossiping housewives.

Humperdinck wasn’t their first choice, but they needed somebody super safe who probably wears velour tracksuits all day. Initially, they thought another MTV personality might be the way to go. They considered Jersey Shore whore Vinny Guadagnino, but realized he has the personality of a deflated sex doll without DJ Pauly D by his side. They also looked at some of the Teen Mom train wrecks, but they were too busy getting in domestic disputes, fucking up their kids’ lives, and training them to be future losers.

MTV plans on keeping most of the original games from the show but tweaking them to fit the new host’s persona. Fan favorite Kick ‘Em Out the Classroom will be revamped and renamed Kick ‘Em Out the Nursing Home and Cover up Their Death if You OD Them. Turn Up for What is also a favorite that will continue to be featured under it’s new name, Turn Up Your Hearing Aid: What!!! And the wildly popular Talking Spit will remain unchanged since old people always spit when they talk.

Madhouse Magazine reached out to Mr. Humperdinck for comment but he was unavailable while he recuperated from a recent hospitalization. His publicist said his right eyeball popped out of his head at barbershop where he was getting a twist out with a fade in preparation for the show.