Bob Dylan Wins Welterweight Boxing Championship

On this day in 1994, 53 year old Bob Dylan defeated Welterweight champion, Jake Rodriguez, in an exciting 12 round, knock down, drag out boxing match.

Not much is known about Dylan’s boxing prowess as he fights under the names, ‘The Beast From Hibbing’ and ‘Sugar Ray Zimmerman’, but Dylan has an amazing professional record of 107-6-2 with 88 knockouts.

Hands Like Anvils

“His hand’s are like anvils” said famed boxing trainer, Angelo Dundee. “He ate lightning and crapped thunder. I never saw a fighter with more heart than Bob Dylan. Sure he was a good musician and songwriter, but boxing was his true passion. When that bell rang, that songwriter disappeared and ‘The Beast’ appeared. He was a monster. There will never be another like him.”

‘Sugar Ray Zimmerman’ vs Jake Rodriguez was a title fight that had everything: battering blows, lightning combinations and underhand tactics. Zimmerman, knocked down twice, spat out his mouthguard on both occasions to gain additional recovery time before delivering what he called the ‘perfect’ right hand to stun Rodriguez into submission in the 12th round.

Bob Dylan Boxing Championship

Dylan qualified for the American boxing team and was selected to lead the team at the 2020 olympics in Tokyo. “Hey man I will be ready whenever they have the olympics”, said Dylan. “2020, 2021, I am staying in top form and will be ready to go when that bell rings.”

Dylan is still in tip top shape to this day and has a daily routine that would put Rocky Balboa to shame. “I drink a dozen raw eggs, jog 10 miles, jump rope and put in the work. Just like in the movie Rocky, I even worked out a deal with a local butcher and I pound my meat every day. I love that movie.”