Bob Dylan was voted Sexiest Man Alive by Madhouse Magazine today.
The staff, writers, and management of Madhouse Magazine, polled over 500,000 subscribers and Bob Dylan aka Robert Zimmerman won by a landslide.
Dylan arrived gleefully at the NYC offices of Madhouse Magazine to accept his award. When asked by reporters about the Nobel Prize, Dylan responded “I ain’t got time for that, thats a bunch of blowhard, stuffed shirts, congratulating themselves for things that nobody cares about. Now Madhouse Magazine is something I can get behind and being voted Sexiest Man Alive, is a huge honor, and one that I take seriously.”
Starting January 2020, Dylan embarks on a yearlong national speaking tour, traveling approximately 20,000 miles per month and changing cities every few days. He will spend the tour addressing various audiences at schools, public events and fundraisers, promoting and increasing awareness of his sexiness.
Dylan is also a goodwill ambassador for Madhouse Magazine, raising awareness for the magazines importance in society. Other duties include television appearances, national parades, hometown events and promoting dumb issues.