Axl Rose Throws Rabid Wolverine Into Crowd Instead of Mic

Seven fans were injured at a Guns N’ Roses concert when Axl Rose threw a rabid wolverine into the crowd. Prior to this event, Rose had a tradition of throwing his microphone into the audience after all GNR shows. Axl was throwing his mic without incident for more than 30 years. That is until last week when some dummy got injured in Australia.

Vegemite Sandwich

According the Aussie Gazette, Sheila Hogan had been standing close to the stage during the concert on Nov. 29. Hogan claimed when Rose tossed his microphone into the crowd following the band’s last song, Paradise City, the device hit her in the face. “I was gorging myself on a Vegemite sandwich and guzzling a Foster’s” said Hogan. “Then I am smashed in the face causing me to drop my beer and sandwich. If it had hit me in the ‘gunt’ it could have killed me.”

Big Surprise

Rose then announced on social media that he will no longer throw his microphone into the crowd. “It has come to my attention that some slob may have been hurt at our show in Australia. I have always hated Australia. It is a country of weird, inbred convicts. Nevertheless, in the interest of safety I will stop throwing my mic. But I got a big surprise for you all at the next show.”

Well, as it turned out that big surprise was a rabid wolverine. Right after Paradise City, Axl dedicated the song “I Used to Love Her” to Sheila and then threw a large rabid wolverine into the crowd. The wolverine immediately attacked, bit and clawed seven fans in the front row as concert goers fled for the exits. A large security guard wrestled the wolverine to the ground. The guard got the animal into a chokehold and then escorted the beast out of the auditorium.

Rabid Wolverine

Axl Rose was laughing maniacally and yelling into the microphone, “Hey Australia how you like me now. Is that better than throwing my microphone? Do you enjoy a rabid frothing wolverine? Good because that’s what you got. You get a rabid wolverine, you get a rabid wolverine, you all get a rabid wolverine. I hope you enjoy your rabies treatments for the next 8 weeks.”

Rose continued, “And I hope you enjoy the riot that is about to happen. You should have just let me continue throwing the mic but no, some dummy had to get injured. Now look what you get. I tried to get out and they pull me back in, Goodnight Australia.”