Aerosmith Tour Cancelled Again! Steven Tyler Back in Rehab

Aerosmith’s farewell tour is cancelled once again. The iconic rock band from Boston announced it will cancel its “Peace Out” tour just one day after declaring the tour was back on. The tour has been mired in cancellations and postponements for years due to Steven Tyler’s injuries, ailments and addiction woes.

On Wednesday, an Instagram post on the band’s official page declared that they’re “thrilled” to announce the rescheduled dates for the “Peace Out” tour. Then just one day later they announced that they must once again cancel the tour because Steven Tyler is back in rehab to cure him off his nasal spray and moth ball addictions.

Aerosmith Tour Cancelled

An enraged Joe Perry took to X to express his outrage. “Steven is a GD loser. Who gets addicted to moth balls? How does he even get the moths to spread their legs? I have had to endure 50 years of misery with this guy. He is hopped up on goofballs, then a foot injury, sex addiction, a throat tragedy and now moth balls! Someone get me Axl Rose on the phone.”

Perry continued, “I was so excited when the tour was back on and I didn’t have to sell my car. I got a lot of mouths to feed you know. Now that sumbitch Steven is all hopped up on moth balls. He is taking food out of my babies mouths. If it were up to me, I would replace him with Axl for good.”

“There is no way I am giving back this money” said Bass Player Tom Hamilton. “We are playing all of these shows, I could throw a rock and hit a singer with it. Hey The Black Crowes are opening for us, get that Chris Robinson guy, he’s a good singer. Plus he is already getting paid so we can keep Steven’s share. I don’t care if we have to hire Lizzo, we are doing this tour.”

Metamucil

Aerosmith promised the final tour will include their “biggest production ever,” utilizing “133 person crew, 22 semi trucks, 158 rigging points, 10 tour busses, over 600 lights, 67 guitars, 10 basses, 5 scarves, a 50 gallon drum of Metamucil, 4 legends of rock and some random guy playing drums!”

Historically, Aerosmith is a quintet but the drummer Joey Kramer was quietly asked to step down after mistaking his bass drum for a toilet. Rumors are swirling that a surprise drummer will join the tour. Names such as Alex Van Halen, Ringo Starr, Carmine Appice and Sheila E have been thrown about. Stay tuned as anything is possible with Aerosmith. Maybe this is all a big joke and the tour is actually still on! Check your local listings.