Neil Young Bites, Punches, & Kicks Reporter for Dumb Questions!

Reporter Stephen Bello of the Ontario Press was bitten, punched and kicked by a furious Neil Young, after the man asked a series of stupid questions during an interview. 

Young is known for his hot temper and violent outbursts. Neil however has been taking anger management classes recently and has gotten his explosive behavior in check. “I have been doing a lot of yoga” said Young. “My coach gave me a few tricks that I keep up my sleeve if I start feeling angry. As soon as I start feeling my blood boil, I say to myself, Pins and Needles, Needles and Pins, a Happy Man is one that grins. Then I count to ten and I forget why I am angry. It works every time.”

Rust Never Sleeps

Well almost every time. Bello first asked “Is it true that Rust Never Sleeps?” to which Neil replied “Next Question Please.” The reporter then followed up with “How do you Write Songs?” Neil retorted “I am ready to end this interview now!” Bello pleaded with Neil to stay and promised to ask better questions. 

Neil Young Bites, Kicks & Punches Reporter
Neil Young Bites, Kicks & Punches Reporter

Mr. Young agreed but the final straw came 30 seconds later when Mr. Bello asked “Who do you like Better – Graham Nash or Johnny Cash?”  to which Neil unleashed a flurry of punches to the reporters head knocking him to the ground. Neil then bit the mans nose while kneeing him repeatedly in the groin. 

Bello is hospitalized in critical condition but is expected to make a full recovery. “I thought they were reasonable questions” said Bello. “Next thing I know I have this jackass biting my nose. Who does that? What kind of animal attacks a man for asking a simple question. I am done with reporting. I have been beaten up by Sean Penn, Alec Baldwin, Rosie O’Donnel and now Neil Young.”

Related Stories: Neil Young Launches Cinnamon Girl Scout Cookies

1 thought on “Neil Young Bites, Punches, & Kicks Reporter for Dumb Questions!

  1. Neil Young should be arrested for this egregious act of violence. What ever happened to Freedom Of Speech.
    I, for one, am appauled!

Comments are closed.